i got tomorrow coming
the hanged man, death, and justice. Ok.
i think tomorrow ill be in the right headspace to talk about things, being at work and all. the weekends are awful for me, i have all this free time but no motivation to do a single thing with it, and it's so awful for me. i want to do things, i so desperately want to be productive or creative, i have ideas and i have things i want to do but i cant bring myself to do any of it. the idea of doing something that isnt exactly the one single thing im mindlessly doing hurts so badly, and i dont know how to fix it. i don't know how to fix myself. i feel so broken, i feel like such an awful person with no real worth and i don't know what to do about it. if i were normal, i'd be liked, if i could be fixed, maybe i'd be kept around. but i'm not and i don't know if i'll ever be. i'm a shell of the person i want to be. and it's not in the terms of a metamorphosis, either. i never changed from that. i was just never that person. i will never be that person. i can't handle anything that happens to me. i can't be a normal person. i don't know if i'm consistently mistreated or i make things up in my head. i want to know so that i can do something about it. i don't know if Hanged Man, Death, Justice is truly the answer, but it was a really awful spread to get today. i don't really know what to do. sorry. if i'm being punished this much, then surely i've done something wrong. i'll be fine. see you tomorrow.
I got tomorrow coming, I got, got, I got
I got tomorrow coming, in, in, in, in, in
Birds, fuck you